NIGHT O' THE SKUNK ! ! ! ! !

NIGHT O’ THE SKUNK!!!

Or ‘morning of the skunk’


We in CaulEEEfonia have been enjoying a wonderful (for human beings) summer of unseasonably, and record, sways in temperature. We have gone from mid-90’s days in very early spring to high 50-degree temps in July and August. The nights have regularly been in the high 40’s and low 50’s. I have been enjoying this summer a great deal, what with being a post-menopausal female with continuing hot flashes and night sweats.

So, even with these low temperatures, I run my fans at night, choosing to cover up with a variety of different light quilts in order to get that ‘perfect sleep’. And, oh has it been wonderful. One night a few weeks ago, I slept with only a sheet, after a day of 107-degree heat and an 89-degree evening, all three fans blowing the hell out of my hair, sweeping it around and tickling my face. It was hard to sleep that night, but nothing like my last one.

It was a lovely night of 52 degrees. Quiet and still, without the occasional high-speed and so, loud, acceleration of some high school boy’s souped up car that takes place on the road next to my bedroom. Ahhhh…… Lovely.

And then…and then….!!!! About 3AM, I was awakened by the stench of high-velocity skunk stink. This was no ‘skunk passing by’ kind of stink, but the Real Thing. This was a result of, no doubt, a real skunk spray attack. Yuck. The little bastard must’ve done it right outside my bedroom window. But I was sleeping hard and drifted off, thinking that it would go away by itself and I could continue my nice, quilted sleep.

But NOOOOOOO!!!!!!! The little devil – was it hit by a car in the street, still oozing that powerful smell? I couldn’t see anything outside my window, but I got up to pee, just in case that might become an even more annoying situation later in the early morning. I crawled back in bed after closing the windows and dropped off.

Speed ahead 3 more hours. When my clock alarmed, I was awakened to the lingering smell of Skunk. I got up, quickly dressed and grabbed some air freshener. It smelled the worst in my bedroom (of course – why not?) and the rest of the house had a hint of skunk, which could be addressed more easily.

I still have not located said skunk, so I can only imagine that some unlucky feral cat or dog wandering the streets was gassed, but good….well that animal and ME.

I wonder what necessary function is provided by skunks.